Two Things Can Be True
Two Things Can Be True
Two things can be true: We can embrace grief and celebrate life!
Life is a complex tapestry of emotions, and in the past three months, I've found myself riding an emotional rollercoaster like never before. Grief and loss have taken center stage, but so have moments of joy and celebration. All in all, they've taught me valuable lessons about the resilience of the human spirit.
Embracing Grief:
Saying Goodbye to My Grandmother: On June 1st, I celebrated my birthday, launched my website, and also rushed my grandmother to the hospital. Whiling sitting in the ER, all I could reflect on was that I am who I am, because of the choices my grandmother made in her life which led us here. Two months ago, I said my final goodbye to my beloved grandmother. Her passing left an indelible void in my heart and home. But through this loss, I've learned that grief is the price we pay for the privilege of having someone so special in our lives. In my grief, I found a renewed appreciation for the importance of cherishing every moment with loved ones. After having lived with her all my life, helping take care of her after her stroke 12 years ago, and walking with her during the stroke that would inevitable take her life, I felt nothing but relief when we found her one morning with her hands clasps together, almost as if in prayer, which is no surprise to all who knew her. Sitting with this grief also brought me clarity about what I wanted my next steps to be.
Remembering a Former Student: Losing a former student is a heartbreaking experience. Mid August, I got the news of her passing and it struck me like a an unexpected punch to my gut. My grandmother who was 92, I could understand. But a young woman in her mid-twenties I could not fathom. Her passing brought me back to the school I previously taught at and face to face with students I had not seen in years. My favorite course to teach in high school was one on Loss, Grief, & Healing to the Senior class. Needless to say, at the face of this tragedy all of my education on the topic went out the window. Seeing their pain and disbelief left me speechless. It was in the mist of this moment that I learned, sometimes, you plant seeds that you'll never see sow or flourish. Years later, while I stood there holding my former students, it was them who were teaching me about loss, grief, healing, strength, and hope.
Celebrating Life:
Birthdays Galore: In the midst of sorrow, there were birthdays—my own, my sisters' and those of dear friends. These celebrations served as poignant reminders that life goes on. Each candle on the cake represents another year of growth, learning, and the potential for new beginnings. Birthdays are not just about age; they're about the wisdom and experiences we've gained. In times of grief, the support of friends is invaluable. My trusted and carefully curated group of friends taught me that even in our darkest moments, we have the capacity to connect with others, share our burdens, and find joy in one another's company.
New Opportunities: As one job came to an end, another one began. It was a bittersweet transition, but it reaffirmed the cyclical nature of life. Endings are often the precursors to exciting beginnings. After being blessed with working from home for a year, which no doubt helped while my grandmother was sick and dying, I leave behind my life as a private criminal defense attorney and go back to my calling in public service as an Assistant Public Defender. My new job will surely bring fresh challenges and opportunities, reminding me that change can be a catalyst for personal growth.
Uplifting Lessons:
Balance in the Chaos: Life's duality, with its mix of joy and sorrow, is a reflection of our shared human experience. Embracing both sides of the coin helps us grow stronger and more resilient.
The Gift of Time: Grief has taught me the importance of time, not as a constraint but as a precious resource. It's a reminder to spend it wisely with those who matter most, which may also require that we limit our access to others.
Resilience through Connection: Our capacity to grieve, heal, and celebrate is magnified when we connect with others. Sharing our experiences, both sad and joyful, creates a web of support that uplifts us all.
The past three months have been a profound journey through grief and celebration. They reinforced the idea that life is a series of interconnected moments, each with its own purpose and lesson. Embracing both the tears and the laughter is what makes our journey beautiful and meaningful. So, let's continue riding this rollercoaster of life with courage, gratitude, and a heart full of love.